FRIDAY FUNNY

CHILDREN CAN TELL STORIES WITH SUCH TRUTH

 

A teacher is explaining biology to her 3rd grade students.  She says, “Human beings are the only animals that stutter.” A little girl raises her hand saying, “I had a kitty-cat who stuttered.”

The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become.  So, she asked the girl to describe the incident. “Well,” she began, “I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!”

The teacher exclaimed, “That must’ve been scary!”  The little girl said, “It sure was. My kitty raised her back, went ‘Sssss!, Sssss!, Sssss!’ and before she could say ‘S#!t,’  the Rottweiler ate her!”

The teacher had to leave the room.

FRIDAY FUNNY

One Sunday morning, a young child was acting up during the worship service. 

The parents did their best to maintain some sense of order in the pew but were losing the battle.  

Finally, the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle on his way out.  

Just before reaching the safety of the foyer, the little one called loudly to the congregation, “Pray for me! Pray for me!”

WEDNESDAY WISDOM

Be Aware of Those Around You

No matter how insignificant you may think they are

 

As this college student learned.
“During my second month of college, our professor gave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one: “What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?”

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman many times. She was tall, dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name?

I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank. Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade. “Absolutely,” said the professor. “In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say “hello.”

I’ve never forgotten that lesson.  I also learned that her name was Dorothy”.

MONDAY MANI

 

This is the one product I often advise my client’s to use.  IT WORKS!  Formula 2 is the one most often suggested to clients with weak, soft, peeling nails.  Formula 3 for dry, brittle nails for those cooks and bakers.  They seem to wash their hands and dishes and clean the kitchen more often, thus drying out the nails because nails take on water.  Nailtiques 2Plus Formula is for those who’ve had a bad or long term hard gels or acrylics experience and want to go natural for a while.

My clients often say, ‘I want hard nails’, and I’ll advise, ‘No, you want strong nails’.  Nailtiques strengthens nails and not harden.  If used properly, the outcome for your nails will be where you want to go.  Of course, you can’t mistreat your nails and expect perfect nails.

Try it.

 

FRIDAY FAITH

Hope of Eternity

Isaiah 53:4-6 Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him, and afflicted.  But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.  We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all

(Matthew 18:11) “For the Son of Man has come to save that which was lost.